Monday, July 10, 2006

I woke up dead

Life is one big crap shoot. My partner at work was out last week
because his sister-in-law died unexpectedly. She was at a birthday
party, felt a little tired and went to lay down. They found her 1/2
hour later - dead of a heart attack. She was less than a year older
than me. Most of my mom's family died like that in their early 50's.

I have 2 reactions to stuff like this. One is to think "I just don't feel
very old - why am I even thinking about death?" (Course I had a
friend who died like that when he was only 33!) The other reaction is
every morning that I wake up alive, is to be amazed and feel kind of
lucky.

That humans still go on with all their petty, mundane things when we
are all faced every day with death is really kind of a strange and
bizarre thing. It doesn't make us live better, or faster, or do more
monumental things.

We get up, wonder what's for breakfast and go about our zombie
days -ignoring how precious every second is. We waste it like time
was endless. Maybe it is, and we inherently know that.
Or maybe we are really stupid.

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