Monday, February 05, 2007

Whining From the Dead

Nobody shot me, so I was forced to face the scale this morning.
And then I shot myself, so I can't write this, because I'm dead.

But since I seem to be typing, anyways, I'll keep going.
Calorie theory really bugs me. You have to eat 3500 extra
calories to put on 1 pound. I also should burn a bit over
2000 calories, just to keep me moving for a day.

But if I eat over 1500 calories a day, I gain weight. This
weekend I ate about 3000 calories each day. So by calorie
theory, that is an excess of 2000 calories, if you don't
count all the exercise I did. So at worst, I should have
gained about 2/3 of a pound. So where did the 5 pounds
come from? In two days?

There isn't a doctor that can explain it to me. All they can
do is recite useless calorie theory that I absolutely prove
wrong every day. Great, I can produce miracles, but what a
worthless miracle. Why couldn't I challenge money theory?

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