Sunday, August 17, 2008

And the challenge of the hour is....

I think I have too much practice overcoming adversity.
I'm ready to practice being rich and traveling and having too
much fun.

The back took until today to heal up. And probably all the limping
around with the bad back has screwed up my leg. A huge painful
knot in it, making it hard to walk.

Battling a lot of stress. Work and health are getting to me.
(and no vacation for over a year....). Couple of big projects
in full swing at work, and trying to deal with why I feel so
rotten all the time in the health front.

I did a lot of reading about the hormone balances of cortisol,
thyroid, progesterone and such. It looks like a good bet for
the source of a lot of the problems - but you need a lot of
tests, and someone who knows what they are doing (read expensive).

I fretted all weekend about going to a local expert doctor, and
finally contacted them. I think I'm going to give it a try.
It caused me a lot of stress this weekend, making the decision
- if I should spend the money and go back in debt (which I just
got out of), because it might not work. However, living like I
am now isn't worth it.

Also I think we are on death watch again on the old dog. He is
declining, in spite of hundreds of dollars of meds and vet visits.
I beg the powers that be and the animal spirits, every hour, that
he will go comfortably in his sleep. He is sleeping all the time
now, but he still is eating and drinking - so I just have no idea
how long he has. I was sure he was going to die several times in
the last 6 months. It is a stressful and heartbreaking thing to
watch. It preys on my mind a lot.


Big Phil said...

I will try to channel the doggie spirits on his behalf as well..

Susan Grandys said...

Thanks! That makes me feel better.
Maybe they will listen and come when
it is his time.